10 Silent Years Not So Silent

Finishing up your senior year in high school you feel like you are looking across the ocean. Knowing there is so much out there that has yet to be discovered and having so much energy and passion to chase it. In 2000 I was 18 years old and felt the Lord calling me to ministry full time, but it seemed so big and so vague, but yet I was ready to tackle it the very next day.

The calling had very few details, but the passion was undeniable. Through my college career I was pursuing the details of my calling like the baby bird in the book, "Are You My Mother?" but with the question of "Are You My Calling?" Each summer in college looked different. 2001 I worked for my home church in Wynne, Arkansas as a summer intern. 2002 I served in Madrid, Spain doing summer sport evangelism, 2003 I served in Thailand working with the Chinese. 2004 I worked as a summer counselor at a summer camp in Texas.

At the ending of my college career I was convinced I knew the ending of my book, I believed my assignment was working in south east Asia ministering to women in the sex industry. Shortly after my discovery my "silent year" begin.

2005 I finally finished college. (what a miracle!) The direction I was receiving didn't match up to my previous understanding of my assignment. Not understanding, but yet willing to obey I moved to Texas to start my one year discipleship program at T Bar M Camps. Believing it was only for year I wasn't too concerned. Little did I know that my understanding would be wreck so quickly. I feel in love with a cute Texas boy and I knew marriage was quickly to follow. But don't worry, I knew he had a heart for missions so all systems are still a " go" for overseas missions.

The "silent year" turned into "silent years". Still hearing information from God that didn't match up to my first understood calling, I took at job as a corporate sales executive at T Bar M Resort and Conference Center. I traveled with trade shows, did outside sales, attended the majority of the  different Chamber of Commences events in the Texas Hill Country, worked manager shifts overseeing housekeeping, guest and food services. Many times wondering where I misheard God in His calling for my life.

After a few years I returned back to the T Bar M Camps where I first started in Texas, but doing similar sales with groups, churches, and non-profit organization. I had to learn more about budgets, monthly and weekly reports, marketing, managing schedule of staff members while learning more about the non-profit and religious industry. During this time period my cute husband was working as a camp director and we grew our family through birth of our son and adoption of our daughter. 

Now most college girls would jump at the idea of this being their future. But deep down I would get frustrated with a piece of the puzzle I received when I was in college that doesn't make any sense with the other piece i'm currently using. In 2013 time at camp was feeling to come to an end for our family. I knew God was calling us to another ministry and I thought for sure it had to be Peru since we have been investing our heart so much there over the past 9 years.

November 2013 we sold our house in one day and started moving all of things into storage in College Station, Texas. No home and no understanding why we were moving to what seemed like a christian bubble college, but trusting God that He has purpose for everything.

Over this past year and half I've started seeing the pieces of the puzzle starting to fit together. From finding a home, a church, community to finally finding my calling, I've been blown away by seeing God throughout the process. I wish I could write every detail down, but even my sweet God fearing mamma would get tired of reading it all.

Since moving to College Station I have stayed on working with for T Bar M Camps remotely, but I've been volunteering on the club team for Jesus Said Love (JSL). We get the opportunity to go into the local strip club to build relationships with the dancer and get the opportunity to share God's grace, love and hope through our actions and words.

This ministry has stretched me and challenged me and yet I continue to be in awe of God's faithfulness and abundance in His extraordinarily love for the dancers and other club staff members. I've been asked to come on staff for JSL as the City Team Leader. Some of my responsibilities will be team management- overseeing all managerial functions of city team of volunteers, conducting meetings, forming and maintain local and regional partnership with churches and business.  Development for funding, budgeting and monthly expense reports. Lastly focusing on communication among executive leadership team, supporting organization, volunteers and dancers. .

Looking back over the year and seeing my experiences, opportunities applied with much needed maturing and what the position requires, it obvious the silent years weren't so silent. Our gracious Father was molding me for such as time as this. I'm humbled over the patience of our God that He would choose me to help lead this ministry in College Station.